Apoligies

Good evening avid readers, yes thats right, i am refering to you as readers because i have been informed that there are more than one of you who have read this over 2 times. take that personal shout outs!

i would like to talk about how great england is for a few minutes. i mean this is a fantastic country to be associated, firstly its ruler was chosen by god, well actually a similar family was chosen, but they made the choice not to rule anymore and obviously their god given right to rule is pretty fluid through cousins and the like. and that god changed about 500 years ago, yet he kept choosing the same family to rule. it is like some bitter custody fight over england. with imaginary parents. secondly their rightful ruler is a french bloke, and they score points for giving it to a german family instead, because if there are two countries the french get on with its the germans and the english.

Oh and france is even better, purely because they just keep getting invaded, and their way of showing agression is blowing up a ship in New Zealand, the only country in the world that if they retaliated would be beaten by the francs. oh and eurodisney is pretty cool.

Kicking countries is a nice easy fall back for my lack of monday night creativity isnt it? i promise i will have some entertaining stories tomorrow, but hey today i babysat kids for six hours so forgive me. i am sorry

Now in closing i will quote king charles I:
"Never make a defence or an apology before you are accused'

pfft what does he know, he was only chosen by god. coincidentally after a war.

matt kearns.

It was nearly a rant about bruno, so consider yourselves lucky.

War on Acceptance

Righto, ambitious daily blogging is taking its toll, like no kidding i spent time standing in the shower this morning (savour that image) thinking about what i would talk about. i mean why? its not like anyone reads this or cares. but hey, i came up with the wonderful idea of talking about how nice it is just to sit for a day.

No anectodes from today as i was sailing, so i attend the tale of saturday last. twas the day before sunday and not a creature was stirring. so i sat, in my room, staring at the rain. my aim here was to solve all the problems of the world, and as it happens america is still at war with "terror" so i apparantley failed, and i am damn sure i created more problems in my own head.

What the hell is a war on an emotion anyway. nice one team bush admin '03 (yeah i used numbers- shutup) come on guys, war on terrorists, maybe. war on bastards who threaten national security by flying planes into symbols of capitalism, maybe. war on terror, now thats just lazy. oh, i just delved to political and am scared of offending someone, so sorry! i do love you, whomever i offended, really i do. anyway from now on i think every war should be a war on some emotion, just for the day that we get the "war on acceptance". it will happen, someday, trust me.

Sex, Drugs, Rock and Roll
Matt kearnnnns.

Robots in Disguise

Good evening and welcome to day # of this abmitiously regular blog. so i have been informed that my current readers are jay, liam, anna, issy, and alex obern. so that make % and a @))5 increase from yesterday. yeah work that one out.

So today has been another uneventful day, with the majority going towards doing my romeo and juliet assignment, causign me to binge on irish culture. and what a grand culture it is. I implore you all to go and buy War, the early U@ protest album, with its sounds likely to be accepted on any independant radio station today. yeah i am getting up on my high horse, i like to call him Fergus.

anyway. michael bay. subject of todays rant. self indulgent tripe the first transformers was, like disgusting, like i vomited half-way through, sure htats because i had a choc-top and one too many dorritos and a litre and ahalf of coke. but i hated it. so of course, like all things i hate, the wonder of a box office brings it back, and we now have champion lifesavers going on about how awesome his transformers cup is. i mean if i gave him a toy he would probably be amused by the fact it is half car half robot after seeing that movie. and he knows the phonetic alphabet.

Transformers #. i hope you never come.

and has anyone else noticed that linkin park wrote the same song twice over and released as different transformers songs. i mean @))& and @))( ones are like the same so die, linkin park. for being part of that attrocity.

Peace, Love, Rock and Roll

Matt (Kearrns!)

Bloody Sunday

Blog @, Go Team. Totally gonna disregard Michael Jacksons death, because, quite frankly, i dont wanna talk about it, if you wanna hear my thoughts, ask me face to face, then you will see that i care.

Good Evening, Issy, Jay, and anyone else who bothers reading this. i have @ readers, correct me if i am wrong? so anyway, I cried during a film today, yes solo-man, alpha male me, cried in a film today. I highly recommend you go out and rent it, it is called 'bloody sunday' and is a dramatisation of the events of the same name that occured late january in Ireland in !(&@. Basically during a peaceful civil rights march, british paramilitary opened fire on protesters leaving a pretty bloody mess.

anyway, besides that today was a pretty trivial day, but a winner nonetheless. haa get it?

Good Night, and Good Luck

Matt (kearns.)

Oh Aren't Puns Witty.

Guess what. Blog !, i have now decided the little icons above numbers are much cooler than real numbers. oh, and i forgot to unhold shift. anyway, damon came up with the wonderful title for my blog.

you know, i feel odd doing this, sort of like talking to myself as no one will read it. but whoever does, kudos to you, and you are totally my favourite.

so today i went to a wardrobe for an ad i will be in. it is for solo in !(&*, and being the fine physical specimen i am, i figured i would be like the solo mans little brother. as it happens i have heard through the grapevine i am a before in a before and after ad. that hurts. bitches. I think i might be the before for the guy who is bigger than the before for the guy who is bigger than the before for the guy who becomes harry kewell. so at one point in my life, i bully the greatest football player australia has ever produced. go patriotism.

So long, Farewell, Auf Wiedersiehn, Adieu

Matt.